The JUNE'09 Soundtrack!

Καλοκαίρι! Έφτασε κιόλας! Ούτε που το κατάλαβα να είμαι ειλικρινής, ίσως επειδή το τελευταίο διάστημα είμαι busy με το fan club που φτιάχνω για την Πέγκυ στο Facebook, με τίτλο "Πέγκυ Ζήνα, λούσου με βενζίνα!". Άλλοι τίτλοι που σκεφτήκαμε με την κολλητή μου και τον φίλο μου τον Πάνο, "Πέγκυ Ζήνα, γύρνα στην κουζίνα", "Πέγκυ Ζήνα, ναι στην γκιλοτίνα!", "Πέγκυ Ζήνα, απέλαση στην Κίνα", "Πέγκυ Ζήνα, πνίξου στην πισίνα", "Πέγκυ Ζήνα, γίνε στο bowling κορίνα", και πολλά άλλα, τρελή έμπνευση έχουμε τα άτιμα, δεν ξέρω ποιό να πρωτοεπιλέξω:-)
Ανυπομονώ για Loreena στις 10 του μήνα (κάνει και ρίμα!) και γενικώς δεν έχω καλύτερο από καλοκαιρινές συναυλίες!
Καλό μήνα να έχουμε και καλό καλοκαίρι σε όλους!
Κι επειδή ήδη οι περισσότεροι οργανώνουμε τις διακοπές μας, μπείτε εδώ! για τα καλύτερα δωρεάν ταξίδια και προορισμούς σε όλο τον κόσμο! Γιατί η Music Bug Tours σκέφτεται τον Έλληνα πολίτη!

Best sOnGs of the month!

*ALESHA DIXON Let’s get excited

*ALEXANDER RYBAK Abandoned

*BEN'S BROTHER & JOSS STONE Stalemate
*BRIAN Tell me what it’s like
*DIMA BILAN Anything 4 love
*EMINEM Insane
*FLUNK Down
*GOSSIP Heavy cross
*GREEN DAY !Viva la gloria!
*JAMES MORRISON Please don’t stop the rain
*JASPER ERKENS Pageturner
*JEANETTE Teach me how to say goodbye
*KASABIAN Thick as thieves
*KAT DELUNA Dance bailalo (original edit)
*KEVIN BORG A hundred different ways
*KEVIN RUDOLF feat. KID CUDI Welcome to the world (Mike Rizzo Funk Generation radio edit)
*KLEERUP feat. TITIYO Longing for lullabies
*KRISTINE W. Never (Love To Infinity Club Mix)
*LADY GAGA Paparazzi
*MANIC STREET PREACHERS Jackie Collins existential question time
*MASTER & SERVANT Step by step
*NOA In your eyes (Ayelet chen)
*POLLY SCATTERGOOD Untitled 27

*RESIDENCE DEEJAYS feat. FRISSCO Sexy love
*SANDER VAN DOORN vs. ROBBIE WILLIAMS Close my eyes
*THE SOUNDS My lover
*TRANSISTOR Living
*TORI AMOS Give
*WOLFFMAN U get your hands up
*YOHANNA Beautiful silence
*ΑΝΔΡΙΑΝΑ ΜΠΑΜΠΑΛΗ Πόσο λυπάμαι
*ΓΙΩΡΓΟΣ ΣΑΜΠΑΝΗΣ Μια ζωή θα’μαι εδώ
*ΔΗΜΟΣ ΑΝΑΣΤΑΣΙΑΔΗΣ 3 λάθη
*ΜΥΡΩΝΑΣ ΣΤΡΑΤΗΣ Ποιός μπορεί
*ΝΙΚΟΣ ΖΙΩΓΑΛΑΣ Σ’αγαπώ
*ΝΙΚΟΣ ΚΑΡΒΕΛΑΣ Η ζωή είναι ωραία
*ΣΑΚΗΣ ΡΟΥΒΑΣ Θα τρελαθώ

AlBuMs of the month!

*Tori Amos ABNORMALLY ATTRACTED TO SIN (alternative pop-rock/acoustic) (8.5)
*Yohanna BUTTERFLIES AND ELVIS (pop) (8)
*Alexander Rybak FAIRYTALES (pop-folk/easy listening) (8)
*Kasabian WEST RIDER PAUPER LUNATIC ASYLUM (rock) (8)
*Γιώργος Σαμπάνης ΜΕΡΕΣ ΠΟΥ ΔΕ ΣΟΥ ΕΙΠΑ Σ’ΑΓΑΠΩ (pop) (8)
*Green Day 21ST CENTURY BREAKDOWN (rock) (7.5)
*The Sounds CROSSING THE RUBICON (rock) (7.5)
*Noa GENES & JEANS (acoustic/ethnic) (7)
*Polly Scattergood POLLY SCATTERGOOD (alternative pop) (7)
*Eminem RELAPSE (rap/hip-hop) (6.5)
*Stavento ΣΗΜΕΡΑ ΤΟ ΓΙΟΡΤΑΖΩ: RESTARTED (hip-hop/pop) (6.5)

*Dima Bilan BELIEVE (pop) (6)
*Ανδριάνα Μπάμπαλη THE ROSE TATTOO (pop/retro) (6)

*Doves KINGDOM OF RUST (rock) (6)

*Ben's Brother BATTLING GIANTS (indie pop/rock) (6)
*Transistor THINGS YOU MISS WHEN YOU BLINK (rock) (6)
*Kevin Borg THE BEGINNING (pop) (6)
*Flunk THIS IS WHAT YOU GET (trip-hop/electronic) (6)
*Late of the Pier FANTASY BLACK CHANNEL (rock) (6)
*Jarvis Cocker FURTHER COMPLICATIONS (rock) (6)
*Σάκης Ρουβάς THIS IS OUR NIGHT (pop) (5.5)
*Lara Fabian TOUTES LES FEMMES EN MOI (pop/easy-listening) (5)
*Kate Voegele A FINE MESS (pop/rock) (5)
*Iggy Pop PRELIMINAIRES (rock/acoustic) (4)

12 POINTS (DOUZE POINTS)

*YOHANNA: Μια από τις καλύτερες παρουσίες κι ερμηνείες της φετινής Eurovision, η Ισλανδή Yohanna πραγματικά με μάγεψε με το τραγούδι της “Is it true?”, το οποίο κατέλαβε την δεύτερη θέση στον τελικό.
*ALEXANDER RYBAK: Το φάγανε το παιδί οι «κακιασμένες» του Star κι όχι μόνο. Εγώ αυτό που ξέρω είναι ότι είναι μόλις 23, έγραψε μόνος του το τραγούδι, έπαιζε βιολί, χόρευε και τραγουδούσε, ήρθε από το πουθενά και τους εντυπωσίασε όλους με το τραγούδι του κι όχι με εφφέ. Την άξιζε την κορυφή ό,τι και να λένε! Και πάψτε πια να πιστεύετε ό,τι παπαρολογίες λέει ο καθένας. By the way, το κομμάτι έκανε νέα είσοδο στο #10 των UK charts!
*ΣΑΚΗΣ ΡΟΥΒΑΣ: Δεν πειράζει! Έκανε ό,τι μπορούσε και το υποστήριξε τέλεια το τραγούδι (αν το’λεγε ο Τσαλίκης ή ο Μαρτάκης θα πηγαίναμε άπατοι). Next time με κάτι πιο «κοντά» σε μας. Δεν είναι τυχαίο που όταν στέλνουμε ethnic πάμε πολύ καλά (Die for you, Shake it, My number one, Secret combination). Βγήκαμε 7οι μέσα σε 42 χώρες! Η Patricia Kaas τι να πει που είναι μεγαλύτερη star κι έδωσε μια εξαιρετική παρουσία κι ερμηνεία? Τα πράγματα είναι πολύ απλά, δεν άρεσε το τραγούδι μας.
*LARA FABIAN & NANA MOUSKOURI: Η εμφάνιση της Nana στο τέλος του νέου video clip της Lara Fabian “Soleil soleil” (διασκευή παλαιότερου κομματιού της Nana) είναι όλα τα λεφτά! Δείτε το video εδώ!
*ROXETTE: Το reunion είναι πλέον γεγονός, και σηματοδοτήθηκε από την εμφάνιση της Marie σε συναυλία του Per Gessle στο Άμστερνταμ στις 6/5. Δείτε το video εδώ!

NO POINTS TO…

*NICOLE SCHERZINGER: Η lead singer των Pussycat Dolls τη μία φήμες τη θέλουν να εγκαταλείπει το γκρουπ για σόλο καριέρα, την άλλη λέει ότι δε θέλει. Μεταξύ μας η γκόμενα τα’χει κάνει τόσο μουνί-καπέλο στο group, που θα μετονομαστούν σε Pussy-hat Dolls!
*ΕΛΕΝΑ ΠΑΠΑΡΙΖΟΥ: Μου αρέσει πολύ το νέο της κομμάτι «Θα’μαι αλλιώς», αλλά το video clip είναι φτηνιάρικο, πρόχειρο και θυμίζει διαφήμιση σερβιέτας.
*ΑΝΝΑ ΔΡΟΥΖΑ: Παίζει να’ναι η πιο ηλίθια τηλεπαρουσιάστρια που έχουμε! Θάβοντας τον Νορβηγό Alexander Rybak, λέει η «θεά»: “Είναι δυνατόν να ψηφίσουν κάποιον που λέει ότι το είδωλο του είναι ο Michael Jackson, όταν έχει κατηγορηθεί για παιδεραστία και κρέμαγε τα μωρά από τα μπαλκόνια?”. No comments!
*DEPECHE MODE: Όπως είχε γίνει και με την P!nk στο Fly Beeyond Festival, έτσι και με τους DM, με τη διαφορά ότι αυτό με την ακύρωση της συναυλίας at the last minute ήταν πολύ χειρότερο γιατί και 35.000 άτομα ήταν και στο Terra Vibe. Φοβερός επαγγελματισμός! Drugs drugs drugs…κι ας λένε για αφαίρεση όγκου κλπ, το οποίο διαγνώσανε πολύ αργότερα. Τουλάχιστον απ’ότι διάβασα θα επιστραφούν τα χρήματα σε όσους δεν επιθυμούν να τους δουν σε μια επόμενη τους συναυλία στην Αθήνα.
*MADONNA: Το ότι το τελευταίο της album “Hard Candy” έχει πουλήσει μέχρι στιγμής μόνο 3.000.000 αντίτυπα περίπου και είναι το δεύτερο πιο αποτυχημένο της album μετά το “American life” λέει πολλά!
*LARA FABIAN: Ναι, η Lara αυτό το μήνα παίζει σε διπλό ταμπλώ. Δεν είναι δυνατόν να κάνει 4 χρόνια να βγάλει νέο cd, και να βγάζει ένα βαρετό άλμπουμ γεμάτο αδιάφορες διασκευές, στις οποίες λίγες αξίζουν. Κρίμα για μια τόσο σπουδαία φωνή κι ερμηνεύτρια!

Martorial elegance # 21

We've noticed that Curtains has been partial to a sleeveless denim-jacket in recent times but, realistically, this is a particularly unforgiving item of gear which shouldn't be attempted by anyone who isn't a 70s NY Puerto Rican gang member or Lemmy.

However, we've spotted a couple examples of the armless jean-jacket which are, at the very least, interesting takes on the look :



The Hub festival last weekend saw Tuf Tim Twist going for the old skool Popmaster Fabel painted denim look and he manages to pull it off, if only for of the ridiculouslness of a 40-something white bloke from the U.K attempting the look in the first place and the painted graf' on the jacket itself being pretty good.

On the flip-side, we have this hesher, recently spotted by Killa Barratt, who's gone for the metal-take on the look :





Your author can't call it on this one. If our subject is a bonefide hesher who just wants to celebrate his love of those pre-whigger crossover days when metallers looked like proper metallers and not members of the Boo Yaa Tribe then he should be applauded, but should this fellow be some ironic twerp out for the LOLz then we'd like to douse the jacket in petrol and set it alight, preferably with him still inside it.

Keak Da Sneak ft. E-40 - White Tee, Blue Jeans And Nikes



Trouble - Assassin



Curtains - Night Of The Living Dope

Lady GaGa: "Paparazzi" video

She's just too fucking brilliant. Seriously. IDK how she does it.

Really bad lieutenant

You may or may not remember that Bad Lieutenant gets all sorts of crazy love here at The Martorialist and we're quite fond of a few Werner Herzog flicks too so we're weirdly excited about the upcoming Bad Lieutenant remake by Herzog now we've seen the trailer which was released on wednesday :



Of course, it looks like an utter car-crash with Nicolas Cage (who's become the definition of a hack, but who we love due to the greatness of Raising Arizona, Wild At Heart, Leaving Las Vegas, the 10 minute long opening tracking shot of Snake Eyes and Face/Off, particularly the scene where he says he wants to take Travolta's face...off and gestures outwards from his mug with his hand in a triangular shaped motion) usurping Harvey Keitel in the lead role, Herzog remaking a movie he claims he hasn't even seen, basing it in New Orleans (this may replace Baller Blockin' as our favourite movie set in the N.O) instead of New York and a cast which includes those esteemed thespians Xzibit, Eva Mendes and Brad Dourif, BUT, damn, this shit looks entertaining and if it includes a new version of the scene where the Lieutenant pulls his pud in the middle of the street over two teenage rawk chickz in a parked car with the juxtaposition of Cage doing his trademark delirious wild-eyed schtick and Herzog urging him to "tueg harder at dast cawwwwk" behind the camera then how can it not be the movie of the summer?

Geto Boys - Crooked Officer

Man Candy #4: Michael Cera

Sigh. Are you seriously surprised that he's part of my Man Candy bunch? I can talk for decades about Michael Cera. But that wouldn't be fair to you guys because you'll be wondering when I'm gonna STFU.

See, I have this huge thing for nerds. Sarcastic, funny, look-a-like-book-smart-but-actually-just-misunderstood nerds. I forgot who is started with, but I really love guys like these, because they think no one notices them or cares, but I swear if I ever met a guy like this, I would give him the attention he would love to receive. UGH! I JUST LOVE NERDS!

Michael Cera fits my type of guy like a condom (LOL! I made a lame funny). He's adorable as fxck, funny as all hell, sweet as sugar and talented like all. He makes me jittery when I see his face or hear his voice. Seriously. If he were right by me . . . I would seriously ask him to marry me. In an instant.

I cannot wait to see "Year One." The trailer already has me bugging. Imagine me in the theatres.

Michael, I am ALL YOURS!

I love hoops sfm

and I am dying for these. please, buy them and send them my way thx!





"These hoops are fully customizable. Each hoop depicts a small miniture scene of a graffiti writer painting the side of a subway train. The great thing about it is, he is there to paint whatever you want! He can write your name or intimate message to a loved one, a political message, whatever its graffiti...anything can go. Each Name or phrase (space allowing) will be rendered in my graffiti handstyle. Feel free to contact me if you have any questions regarding customization etc..."


I want these hoops w/ some dude writing "lady nasty" on it, with a penis or something

I love hoops sfm

and I am dying for these. please, buy them and send them my way thx!





"These hoops are fully customizable. Each hoop depicts a small miniture scene of a graffiti writer painting the side of a subway train. The great thing about it is, he is there to paint whatever you want! He can write your name or intimate message to a loved one, a political message, whatever its graffiti...anything can go. Each Name or phrase (space allowing) will be rendered in my graffiti handstyle. Feel free to contact me if you have any questions regarding customization etc..."


I want these hoops w/ some dude writing "lady nasty" on it, with a penis or something

Rihanna is a BEAUTY.

Check out Ye's video for his new single, "Paranoid," featuring Rihanna. In this light, you truly see how beautiful she is! If she didn't make it as a singer, someone would have picked her to be a model.

WATCH IN HQ!

TIDBIT: I lurve the beat to this joint. Sounds like a techno song from the 80's.

God Bless The GOP

Sometimes you gotta love Republicans.

Right after President Obama announces Sonya Sotomayor as his Supreme Court Justice nominee, I see and hear various conservative talking-heads calling her things like "racist", "not smart", "radical", "activist judge", "unqualified", etc.. Me thinks Christmas is coming early if this keeps up.

Here you have the first ever Hispanic nominee -- and she's a woman. Now you have the party of white guys with a storied history of racism and 'tradition values' (meaning that they prefer women to be barefoot & pregnant and in the home doing the laundry & washing the dishes) calling her dumb and racist. Nice. In fact, it's downright awesome!!

Here you take the Latino community who are the fastest growing group of people in America and you are considering waging a war over her. Unlike African-Americans, Latino-Americans are not all-in with Democrats -- yet. They're heading this way, but they still have shown to have some swing to their vote.

But what is clear is that they don't like the GOP's ideas when it comes to immigration reform (a.k.a. Operation: Throw Them All The Fuck Out) and they don't like the GOP messing with their chance to have representation on the Supreme Court.

I'm just praying that the wackos on the Right decide to start running ads and continue running their mouths because it'll just lead to more years of Democratic dominance in Washington. There's absolutely no doubt that this one is a losing battle, but I hope no one tells the GOP. Shhhhhhh....

The Big Chop and etc.

So I have uber exciting news.

Ugh typing it makes me giddy. But, alas...

1) I'm chopping my hair off. OK, I'm not grabbing an axe and then woopow! Vamoose. Its gone. No. I'm going to the natural hair salon by my school, and I'm getting it cut. Short. Real short. SHORRRTTTT! I cannot help but stress the SHOOOORRRRTTTTT part, you know? For those who've seen my hair, its pretty thick, and it's grown to pass my neck, to a point where I can reach the end of the strand when reaching for it behind my back. WHY THE HELL IS SHE CUTTING HER HAIR? you ask. Guys, don't worry. I know what I'm doing. So many parts of my hair are permanetly straight, due to the fact that I was in this phase where I flat-ironed a lot. Especially the front of my hair to create bangs. I did it all through high school, and in the beginning of college. Well, that damaged it, to a point where it won't curl up. AT ALL. Do you know how deranged my hair looks sometimes? The healthy parts spring up in S and/or spiral curls while some parts are just straight?! UGH. Drives me bonkers. So, chop chop. My little sister threatened that if I go through with this, she won't walk on the street with me. What do I care?! I have an adorable face that I can pull off. I don't think I'll look bad. But I need to do this. I'll be going through this procedure mid June/beginning of July. CANNOT WAIT! AH!

2) I forgot to tell you all that I did pass my radio test, and I am officially a Radio DJ for my schools radio station. So all in due time, I will have a radio show. A 2 hour radio show. That you can listen to on iTunes. OMG, the thought it preposterous but so amazing. I will update you all on this soon enough.

3) I might see Santigold and Amanda Blank perform in concert! Oh that should be interesting. But, get this. DRUMROLL IS IN ORDER! I, me. I might see thee KATY PERRY IN CONCERT! She's performing in NYC and the tix are only $29! Gosh. I am too excited. This is the greatest. My secret lover. The one who I adore. I will see her. Up close. And then . . . sigh . . . ♥ ♥ ♥


Um . . . thats really it. Yeah.

tech post

this is a video about how to make video games 3-D (how it could work in the future) and i think it's amazing/ scary. first of all, the guy in this vid, johnny lee, is totally the nerdy asian friend that i wish i had. he is so cute! even if it might be a little long winded, he figured out how to do all this stuff on his own, and expains everything really well.



this next video he uses the same principles to make a program you can interact with just using your fingers in the air. crazy.

tech post

this is a video about how to make video games 3-D (how it could work in the future) and i think it's amazing/ scary. first of all, the guy in this vid, johnny lee, is totally the nerdy asian friend that i wish i had. he is so cute! even if it might be a little long winded, he figured out how to do all this stuff on his own, and expains everything really well.



this next video he uses the same principles to make a program you can interact with just using your fingers in the air. crazy.

It's not a secret anymore, Helena rocks!

Το post αυτό είναι εξαιρετικά αφιερωμένο στον Mr.Sunshine Espressionist! Ένα μεγάλο thanx για όλα!

Πριν λίγο γύρισα από το 8ο MAD Secret Concert της ΕΛΕΝΑΣ ΠΑΠΑΡΙΖΟΥ. Ο κόσμος άρχισε να συγκεντρώνεται στο Καλλιμάρμαρο όπου 19:00 ήταν το ραντεβού μας. Τα πούλμαν άρχισαν να καταφτάνουν και κατά τις 8 και κάτι μπήκαμε όλοι, χωρίς φυσικά να ξέρουμε που μας πάνε, μιας και δεν έλεγε κανείς κουβέντα:-) Τελικά σε λίγη ώρα καταφτάνουμε σε έναν καινούριο industrial συναυλιακό χώρο κοντά στο Ιπποκράτειο, το οποίο γεμίζει από κόσμο μέσα σε λίγα λεπτά.

Τα φώτα σβήνουν και βγαίνουν στη σκηνή οι De Niro ερμηνεύοντας το "Pretty woman", όταν εντελώς ξαφνικά βλέπουμε από ψηλά ένα γυάλινο ασανσέρ να κατεβαίνει, και την Έλενα να χαιρετάει από μέσα το κοινό, κατεβαίνει κι έρχεται στη σκηνή, με αυτό το αυθόρμητο, όμορφο παιδικό χαμόγελο. Μπορεί όντως να έχει παχύνει, όμως είναι τόσο γλυκειά που δε σε νοιάζει, εξάλλου μου αρέσει που είναι έτσι κι ας λένε κακίες.

Προσωπικά δεν είμαι fan της Έλενας, όμως την συμπαθώ πάρα πάρα πολύ, έχει πολύ καλή φωνή και παρουσία, και πιστεύω ότι αν κάνει καλές επιλογές στα cd και τα τραγούδια της θα πάει ακόμα πιο ψηλά.

HIGHLIGHTS

* Έπαθα πλάκα με την ερμηνεία και την φωνή της στα "Nothing else matters" των Metallica και το "Zombie" των αγαπημένων μου Cranberries. Sorry για την έκφραση αλλά με άφησε μαλάκα! Ίσως επειδή περίμενα πολλά, και τελικά τα έδωσε με άνεση!

* Από τις πιο emotional στιγμές ήταν το "It must have been love" των Roxette στο οποίο "έλιωσα", καθώς και το εξαιρετικό "The rose" της Bette Midler, το οποίο απογείωσε!

* Μου άρεσε πολύ η παρουσία του Γιώργου Σαμπάνη στο κλασικό "The time of my life" του Dirty Dancing, το οποίο ξεσήκωσε το κοινό, και είχαν πολύ καλή χημεία μεταξύ τους.

* Οι 15.50 επίσης πολύ καλοί, έδωσαν ρέστα στο "Wicked game" του Chris Isaak, και μαζί με την Έλενα το έκαναν super rock anthem!

* Δήμος Αναστασιάδης και Έλενα στο "Yesterday" των Beatles!

* "Wonderwall", "Sweet child of mine", "It's my life" και "Can't take my eyes off you".

* Λίγο πριν τελειώσει η βραδιά μας έλεγε η Έλενα το σοκ που είχε πάθει όταν της είπαν για ένα heavy metal band που έκανε διασκευή το "My number one", και το ερμήνευσε κι εκείνη έτσι. Ήταν απλά κορυφή! Μας φαινόταν απίστευτο το κομμάτι αυτό ως heavy metal, αλλά ήταν απλά τέλειο και ξεσηκωτικό!

LOWLIGHTS

* Ο Μύρωνας Στρατής, ενώ τον συμπαθώ πολύ, η φωνή του απλά δεν έβγαινε στο "Should I stay or should I go" των Clash, το προσπαθούσε αλλά δεν...
* Οι De Niro είναι απλά ατάλαντοι!

* Με χαλάει πολύ όταν οι καλλιτέχνες στις συναυλίες τους, κοιτάνε συνεχώς τους στίχους από τα τραγούδια, κι η Έλενα το΄κανε όλη την ώρα με αποτέλεσμα τις περισσότερες φορές να κοιτάζει στο πάτωμα που είχαν κολλήσει τους στίχους.

* Ο τραγικός απολογισμός της ημέρας είναι ο θάνατος 3 μαμουνιών! Το ένα μου μπήκε στο μάτι, και τ'άλλα δύο απλά τα έφαγα καθώς περπατούσα προς το σπίτι μου τραγουδώντας το "Θα'μαι αλλιώς". Ελπίζω μόνο να μην ήταν ζευγάρι, και κυρίως να μην είχαν παιδιά! Ενός λεπτού σιγή παρακαλώ!

Νομίζω ότι με την σημερινή της εμφάνιση η Έλενα "ανέβηκε" πολλά σκαλοπάτια στα μάτια μου, ήταν υπέροχη, αληθινή, ζεστή και δε θα σταματήσω να το λέω το πόσο εντύπωση μου έκανε αυτό το απίστευτο χαμόγελό της! Καθώς φεύγαμε μου λέει ο φίλος μου και big fan της Έλενας, Πάνος, "Έτσι και γράψεις στο blog κάτι κακό πάλι για την Παπαρίζου θα σε τσακίσω!" :-) Η αλήθεια είναι ότι δεν φοβήθηκα καθόλου:-) Και γιατί να γράψω κάτι κακό, εφόσον ήταν τόσο καλή!

Όπως πάντα, σιγά μη σας άφηνα έτσι και δεν έβγαζα photos, ελπίζω να σας αρέσουν!

Greatest movie scenes ever part 8

The fight scene edition.

Firstly, we're gonna have to lay down some rules here : no weaponry other than objects at hand or knuckledusters, meaning that The Warriors vs. The Punks subway bog battle in The Warriors, Matrix vs. Bennett in Commando, pretty much any scene from a Rambo movie, the mass brawl at the beginning of Gangs Of New York and the multi-network battle in Anchorman are all unfortunately disqualified.

Secondly, we're gonna be cruel and narrow it down to 5, which means cigars are not being placed into the respective mouths of Rowdy Roddy Piper vs. Keith David in They Live, Jake La Motta vs. Sugar Ray Robinson in Raging Bull and Daniel San vs. Johnny in The Karate Kid.

So, without further ado, here's our 5 favourite movie fight scenes :

Dolemite vs. the junkies in Dolemite



Instead of do-gooder social workers seeking more leanient sentences for their drug addled clients we're gonna campaign for this being an adequate treatment for smackheads. Here we find the original dapper don Dolemite single handedly taking on a triumvirate of junkies and their hoodrat cum-dumpster bitch after he catches them in the scouser-like act of stripping his car down, taking revenge by kicking supreme asshole with the sort of moves Mr Miyagi would be proud of and then sending the zonked-out dope fiends to return his car to its formerly pristine condition, all while dressed in an outfit which can only be described as amateur golfer meets Tim Wonnacott from Bargain Hunt.

Jerry vs. Buddy in 3 O'Clock High



Some real David and Goliath type shit always makes for an exhilerating fight scene and were it not for Rocky vs. Drago, which we'll get to in a minute, this would be the G.O.A.T of that particular sub-genre. This is probably the most expertly shot high school flick of the 80s with this key scene featuring Goddard style jump-cuts, lingering Leone-esque close-ups and, uh, whoever first used slow-mo-effect shots slow-mo action to accentuate tension and movement. If you can name a more potent movie punch than Jerry's knuckleduster clad valedictory knock-out thump then we'll paypal you a fiver.

Everybody vs. The Ducky Boys in The Wanderers



All our other choices here are one-on-one fights so it's only fair that we rep' for mass brawls too. We just can't get enough of The Wanderers here at The Martorialist so it's only fitting that the football field battle where the previously divided Wanderers, Del Bombers, Wongs etc finally unite to take on the non-stop barrage of creepy Catholics known as the Ducky Boys, with a little help from Joey's moustached musclehead psychopath of a father (who reminds us a little of da gawd Metin). While The Wanderers and The Del Bombers put in work here against the dreaded Ducky Boys we feel it's The Wongs ("27 guys all with the last name Wong who all know Jujutsu who can kill you with one judo chop") who make the difference, as they kick, punch and throw the zombie-like Ducky Boys around with aplomb.

Frank Dux vs. Chong Li in Bloodsport



Though we may prefer Steven Seagal to Jean Claude Van Damme it's hard to deny VD in his prime. We mentioned Van Damme punching out the snake in Hard Target in a post the other day in regards to the effect once hot pregnant chicks have on our cocks but as far as actual fights go then it's all about the final clash against Bolo Yeung as Chong Li from his '88 classic Bloodsport. It's difficult to choose a favourite part of this scene but we're gonna plump for where cheating chinky Chong Li throws white powder in Frank's eyes which allows Van Damme to get his Brando on by pulling constipated faces and lashing out into thin-air as he pretends to be temporarily blinded being the Pièce de résistance.

Rocky vs. Drago in Rocky 4





The best movie ever? Can't decide between Heathers, Once Upon A Time In The West or Rocky 4 but today we're going with the latter option. While we slightly prefer the Driving Reflections montage scene set to Robert Tepper's No Easy Way (AKA the best song ever) as the finest moment Rocky 4 has to offer we'd be hard pressed to disagree with anyone who prefers the epicly brutal Rocky vs. the near-inhuman Drago match in Russia. Geeks will drone on this flick making a heavy-handed point about America's relationship with Russia during the Cold War but Rocky 4 is actually all about heart and balls. Sly was an expert in manipulating the emotions of his audience and after witnessing Drago beating Apollo to death ("if he dies..he dies") this is a scene which can turn usually placid chick-flick loving wenches into bloodthirsty, foul mouthed, screaming lunatics baying for our dopey dago hero to knock the fucking big commie cunt's head off.

Negative Approach - Ready To Fight (Live, 1981)

Puke In My Mouth (Jizz In My Pants Parody)

Lol! This is funny.

What a kneeslapper.

"We're too big a club to get relegated"

Lindsay LOLZhan.







The world can only be a better place now the sight of fat white men removing their replica shirts to reveal badly tattooed beer bellies which hang beneath their genitalia has been consigned to the occasional game against Cardiff, Doncaster or Swansea on Sky Sports 3.

Danzig - Going Down To Die



If only this sweaty, fake-tanned, Matalan-Mourinho of a cunt could have been cast off back into the championship hell where he belongs too, eh?

Play Him Off, Kitteh...

Fucking Dick...

Fxcking Brilliant.

I MET TRAVIE OF GYM CLASS HEROES!

Alright alright alright.

I didn't actually MEET him.

We didn't sit down in Sarbucks with lattes in our hands and talked about our days out in the midst of my home, Brooklyn. We didn't go shopping, and he didn't take me to go see my secret lover (he still doesn't know) Katy Perry♥.

But I will be honest and frank when I say I was two feet away and counting from Travis "Travie" McCoy.

So here I am with my sisters and my little cousins. We had just come from seeing "Night At The Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian," (review coming!) and now it was time to shop! Today was sort of hot but you could still feel a beautiful breeze. So there's this whole strip thats called the Fulton Mall (its actually Fulton Street but since there are so many shops down this strip, they just call it a mall) and we were window shopping since we were all broke, and my sister was trying to find shoes for my little six-year-old cousin, Jonathan. So, we're crossing the street and we stop by a shoe store. When we come back out, I'm sipping on my water when I turn to the right and see this reallly tall dude standing there with a buddy.

He's tall. Oh yea. Tall.

I stare at him for a while, because he just has so many tattoos all over his body. His arms, his neck . . . so I look at his face and I say to my little miss sis, Shani, "Woooow, bro looks like Travie." So she turns and sees him. So she says, "oh wow! He does." Then we spend a good two minutes observing him silently. Then we just instantly stare at each other and shout, "IT'S HIM!" My older sister finally gets in on it and she is just as siked. So we are in awe! Travie? In the Fulton Mall? NO CELEB IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WOULD COME TO THIS STRIP! It's type lame, but, it'll do if you really need to go shopping.

So he starts to walk away, and we refuse to miss this opportunity. So what do you think we do?

We follow him.

For about 20 minutes of our time.

Our older sister got tired of being an amateur stalker and decided to go to Payless, but Shani and I needed to know this was real, so we followed him, dammit.

I phoned up Latoya, who was at school which was just three blocks down, right at the exit of the Fulton Mall. She is trying to calm me down on the phone while she hauls ass to get to where I am!

So Travie goes into a sneaker store and I'm just admiring him from afar, like the crazed fan that I am. Latoya kept telling me to go talk to him. I was so tempted to! but Shani kept pulling me back and saying no. So I stopped. Then Latoya said I should and Shani said I shouldn't . . . grrrr! You can imagine how much pain I was going through. He was just a few feet away!

So I'm waiting for Latoya to catch up to us when he walks out with his buddy.

So Shani and I are on the case. We're on their trail.

But listen. Travie can walk. Speed of light. If he weren't so tall that his head pops up above all of the pedestrians, I would have lost him in a millisecond. So as I'm on the phone with Latoya, telling her where he's walking, he starts walking really fast! To a point where Shani says the words I didn't want to hear: "Bitch, he's gone."

Sigh. Latoya caught up to us a minute after we lost him. Poor girl. She was out of breath. She partially blames me for not using the speed of light that she claims I have to catch him. I don't blame her. Seriously, I should have hauled as much ass as I could.

But, you know what? Being that close to him, knowing it WAS him (to prove it, I saw his tattoos on his neck and his surgery-stretched ear piercing) and knowing that a celeb was in Brooklyn's Fulton Mall has just given me so much hope to spot another celeb.

I mean, I live in NYC for goodness sake.

Possibilities are endless, sweethearts.

Until my next journey . . .

Charles Hamilton? You Got Punched.

Oh buddy. HAHA! Laughing out loud moment. You could see her anger building up!



TIDBIT: No wanna be rappers were harmed. . . . Wait. Yes. Yes they were.

TOP 10 Reasons Why Beyonce's "Ego" video FAILS.

1. Its boring.

2. She flips her hair way too much for no reason

3. It resembles the concept for 'Single Ladies.'

4. The dance moves were way too stiff and intricate.

5. THERE ARE DANCE MOVES! I just love this song so much, and I didn't think it needed to be a dance video.

6. Her 'I can sing it with piano' is my favorite part, so I was expecting her to halt the dancing (its the least she could have done) and just sing it operatically. Nope.

7. I couldn't really focus on the song, cuz I was looking at the dancing.

8. The dancing wasn't that great. Just a lot of POPPING.

9. She was trying to be sexy. That is understood, because I think the song has a sexy edge to it! But . . . Beyonce has lost her sexiness in my opinion. I just see her as a person that dances, sings and (tries) to act. She's not sexy to me. Maybe if she didn't pop and pump and jiggle her body so much, it could have, might have been sexy. But we know Bee. She likes to be perfect. I'm telling you, she's trying to take over the world.

AND THE 10th REASON WHY I DIDN'T LIKE IT??!

10. She looked like either Lil' Kim in some parts or a tranny in most. Sorry. She did.



TIDBIT: When is she reuniting with Destiny's Child? Because seriously, I'm about to drop Bee from my MP3. Officially. And I might not put her back until I hear Kelly and Michelle right there with her.

Cop Alert: Electrik Red

I will say it. Electrik Red is going to bring the true meaning of Sexy Back. Justin tried, and it lasted for oh so long, but then it evaporated. But Elecrik Red is seriously going to bring it back. Their sexy isn't skanky. Their sexy isn't dirty. Their sexy isn't raunchy. Its sexy. The way sexy should be. So therefore, when their album, "How To Be A Lady: Vol. 1" comes out, it will basically show the ladies how to be ladies. Sexy ladies. Classy sexy ladies.

First off, they are all beautiful. Absolutely stunning. Like, wtf. And they have these deep sensual voices that can seduce a person! Plus seriously, they have great music. From what I've heard, "Freaky Freaky, "Friend Lover," and "So Good," are my faves. But I cannot wait to hear the rest of the album!

TIDBIT: Seriously, I feel sexier listening to them!

Movie Review: DANCE FLICK

Alrighty! My first movie review. I was suppose to have one a good while ago for "I Love You, Man," but . . . yahh.

SO! Time to review: I am a funny person. I would like to think so! I love to make jokes, and I love when I laugh at a joke that will literally have me laughing hard and/or bawling my eyes out because it's so funny. When I saw the trailer and the numerous commercials for this film, I knew I was going to laugh my buttocks off. I didn't think. I KNEW. I mean, it's made by the Wayans Bros., who made the amazing first two Scary Movies. They are funny in a whole. That whole fam. So, seriously I would not pass up this opportunity. What opportunity?

My sister got two free tickets to see an advanced screening in NYC. I literally freaked. Free snacks. Free movie! Whoa buddy! So I went with her. The theatre was packed. Hooligans everywhere. So we got a good seat in the front, though everyone knows the middle seats are THEE best. So, there we are. Sitting. And then, we watch.

And watch.

And watch.

This movie is so. So. So. So. Soooooo. Disappointing. It is terrible. I partially blame ads for it because they basically played all the could-be funny jokes in the commercials, so when you watch it, you probably get a chuckle in. That's it. There are so many random parts that are parodies, that it comes to a point where you're like, "What does this have to do with the point?" They parodied Twilight (The Prom scene), Save the Last Dance, Stomp the Yard, You Got Served, High School Musical (Their school was called "Musical High School."), Step Up, Step Up 2 The Streets, Hairspray, Black Snake Moan (Yeah, I know. WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING?!) . . . so much. So much that was so unnecessary. It cluttered the film. And the "funny parts" were not funny! I mean, don't get me wrong. There are parts where you might laugh. MIGHT! But its not worth your money. Please. PLEASE! If you can, find it online. But it is NOT worth spending your hard earned money! Please!!!!

This movie gets: ♥//♥♥♥♥

Dance Flick? You FAIL!

Kawaii Nails

never before have i wanted to get my nails done.....until now! where is Lady Nasty?

Kawaii Nails

never before have i wanted to get my nails done.....until now! where is Lady Nasty?

Great songs from forgotten rap albums part 5

C-Bo - Realer Than Real



C-Bo - Bald Head Nut



C-Bo : one of the greatest living human beings alongside Daily Express racing tipster Computerman. After discovering him via his Mob Figaz connection I copped a bunch of C-Bo albums on the cheap off eBay strictly on the strength of whether I liked the cover or not and since the one for 1993's Gas Chamber set kinda reminded me of Shocker this was the first CD of his I scooped up. The album itself is somewhat of a Northern California G-Funk classic and features one of the definitive C-Bo tracks in Realer Than Real, while the very 'Cube-esque Bald Head Nut, fortunately not an ode to wanking over Gail Porter, is a thorough detailing of his trife exploits, though one assume he must have been plagued by a bout of alopecia himself during recording as he has a full 'doo on the cover.



Casual - I Gotta (Get Down)



Casual - Turf Dirt



Here at The Martorialist we consider Casual's debut Fear Itself to be the Hiero equivalent of Only Built 4 Cuban Linx so it was fitting that, after a couple of late 90s follow-up singles which included bangers like Turkey And Dressing, I Gotta (Get Down) and Turf Dirt, his long-awaited sophomore set He Think He Raw was a disappointment of Immobilarity type proportions. Turkey And Dressing didn't even make the album for reasons I still can't fathom and the aforementioned other tracks from the singles were, to put it politely, on a whole 'nother planet to the rest of the shite on the album when it finally materialised in 2001. I Gotta (Get Down) gave us one of Casual's most LOLlerskates inducing lines in "When i fuck around and be rippin' off the top like a rapist" (rape isn't a funny subject, obviously, unless you count when Robson got arse-raped with a spoon in OZ) and should be nestled in any self-respecting rap-nerd's top ten favourite Alchemist tracks, while Turf Dirt found Cas' cussin' out the type of stank hoodrat we're actually rather fond of over the sort of stark thumper which'll always make me go "ahhh, Sucker M.C's.



Parental Advisory -Ghetto Head Hunter



Parental Advisory - Manifest



Mostly known for being the first album Organized Noize helmed before they went on to produce OutKast, TLC, Goodie Mob etc and having a song playing in the background of an interlude on OutKast's debut, Parental Advisory's first album is actually quite a dandy little release which deserves more love than it currently receives. There's a lyric on Ghetto Head Hunter where the Dres sounding one raps about trying to find his identity as an ATLanta resident amongst his east and west coast peers by asking "Grand Puba or Eazy E - you confused, yo?/I look for skinz and still be cruisin' in a six-fo'" which almost manages to capture the entire steez's of both Parental Advisory and OutKast in a single line, but I guess a more mundane comparison would be Black Sheep-meets-Above-The-Law-And-RBX-through-the-eyes-of-an-ATLien. Ghetto Head Hunter is the song from the 'Kast interlude and, predictably, it's the best track on here; Manifest, meanwhile, is one of the innumerable great rap songs with the word Manifest in its title and includes the lyrical gem that is "those who front are like cunts : they must get wet". Sounds like a philosophy to live by, doggie.

Ft.'d in "Black Girl w/ Long Hair" blog! YAY!

Hola, mi amigas! So, about a month ago, I visited my favorite natural hair blog and asked them a question about my hair because it has been bugging me no more than mosquitos do (HA! Attempt at a joke; FAIL!). The ladies were so kind to answer my question, and because they saw it as a question many other ladies might need help with as well, they featured me in their blog! AHH! Check it out!

BLACK GIRL WITH LONG HAIR

10 Years of Jar Jar Binks

Today marks the 10th anniversary of the release of "Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace". There have been few movies I had been more excited about seeing -- and few that have left me feeling more disappointed.

You can't help but wonder if George Lucas would do anything different if he had to do it all over again. I know I would...

For starters, Jar Jar Binks should have been aborted from Star Wars lore with a rusty wire hanger. It's hard to believe that there wasn't another person involved with the making of "Phantom Menace" who could have alerted Lucas to this disaster in the making. It's a shame that Binks wasn't the one ordered to live out the remainder of his days frozen in carbonite.

Then there's the tragedy of Darth Maul. What did Maul have -- maybe 3 lines of dialog in the entire film? While they marketed the shit out of him, he sure wasn't the next coming of Darth Vader. More like the next coming (and going) of Boba Fett. To take the coolest character, make him have zero significance to the overall story and then let him die like a total chump was a mind-bogglingly bad decision.

No, what us Star Wars fans were really hankering to see was a 60-minute pod race featuring some annoying little kid.

And then there was the unimaginitive dialog, a host of uninteresting supporting characters, not one titillating glimpse of The Emperor and the unnecessary death of Qui-Gon Jin -- the best character (and actor) in the movie.

Saying all of that, I don't hate the film. As a Star Wars geek, I still watch it occasionally, but the fixable flaws are so obvious and you can't help think about what could have been. The missteps in the making of this movie will piss me off to the day I die.

Even this concept may have worked better in hindsight...