Foreign Poster Atrocities #10

Wow...TEN of these things???

Guess so; and there's plenty more to come on these, so enjoy...I guess.

Okay, my imaginary co-host Jeff just wrapped up his teleconference with Tyler Durden, so we'd better get started.

-----






































TGWD - Welcome To Poster Image World! Everything Must Go! All Images Now 75% Off! Special Rates For Horror Images!

TGWD - Act Now and Get A Red Chainsaw In Your Poster ABSOLUTELY FREE!

JEFF - In fact, the only thing your new poster won't have is a spell checker.

JEFF - I really like the fact that there is absolutely not one image here where you'd connect it with Poltergeist 2.

JEFF - Poltergeist 2: just when you thought it was safe to be coherent....

TGWD - If you go into this one expecting chainsaw-wielding demons, you're gonna be sadly disappointed.

JEFF - See, whoever did the poster thought Tobe Hooper directed the sequel, and so didn't want him to feel left out. I think it's sweet.

TGWD - I don't see what difference it would have made here; they didn't make any other homages to...say...anyone who was actually IN this movie.

TGWD - For instance, that is NOT Heather O'Rourke.

JEFF - It's...heyyy, that's Snow White!

JEFF - With a Sham-Wow on her lap!

JEFF - The only kind of product placement Vince Offer could afford.

TGWD - And she's playing with a Talky Tina doll from 'The Twilight Zone'.

TGWD - "I'm Talky Tina, and I hate this stupid artist."

JEFF - And instead of Craig T. Nelson, they put in James Taylor.

JEFF - Sweet Baby James! Get in the Griswold Mobile and DRIIIIVE!

TGWD - Apparently JoBeth Williams paid them the most money, since all they put in of her was her hair and left shoulder.

JEFF - They didn't even get the Vomit Creature right.

JEFF - It's Mothman!

JEFF - The Mothman Prophecies Part II: No, We Couldn't Get Richard Gere Back...Shut Up.

TGWD - Anyone unfamiliar with Poltergeist 2 would expect a demon with eyes on its wings to play the main monster...him and his rubber demon hand puppets.

JEFF - Those look more like rejects from Ghoulies.

JEFF - No...on second thought, they actually look like they are the final products for Ghoulies.

TGWD - Which was a ripoff of Gremlins.

JEFF - Which was also produced by Spielberg.

TGWD - Who is a good friend of Kevin Bacon!

TGWD - Five degrees! Whoo!

JEFF - Hold on a sec; where's the Preacher Guy?

TGWD - Well, duh; look at the poster - not enough room after MGM got all their bonus cheap images from Poster Image World, where images come cheap and so does the quality.

JEFF - I bet Preacher Guy wasn't very happy about being left out.

TGWD - Yeah; about as happy as JoBeth was.

JEFF - Though nobody would be as unhappy as James Taylor.

JEFF - They don't got a friend now.

TGWD - The only thing they do have is...Millions Of Images To Choose From! All At Discount Prices!

JEFF - Come On Down To Poster Image World; Get Your Horror Poster Done By Us!

TGWD - We Also Do Bah-Mitzvah Posters, Wedding Posters And The Ever-Popular Sham-Wow-Wearing Snow White Playing With A Talky Tina Doll!

TGWD - Add Her To Your Poster For Only $4.99 (Supplies Are Limited)!

JEFF - Poster Image World! Five Shops Now In The Tri-County Area!

TGWD - (due to pending litigation, Poster Image World will no longer do any MGM-related posters or anything produced by or connected to Steven Spielberg; we apologize for any inconvenience.)

-----

I guess I just don't understand modern art.

Dope out.

- TGWD