In Praise of Edward D. Wood, Jr.

Ladies and germs, it is a plain and simple fact that you can NOT be a fan of the worst of the worst films ever made without knowing about this man to your left.

Edward D. Wood Jr. was a man who became a legendary symbol of film-making and film-writing only after he died in 1978, but isn't that always the way it goes? True genius is never appreciated when you're alive.

It wasn't like he made the world tremble with the might and majesty of his movies, but rather he made people collectively scratch their heads in bewilderment. Quite an accomplishment in and of itself, and he did it all with a weapon some may call incompetence...but what does the rest of the world know?

Wood was a decorated Marine and, as the most famous story goes, even wore a red bra and panties beneath his uniform during many battles. Small wonder, then, that some of Wood's most telling stories he ended up writing as a civilian were titled "Death of a Transvestite", "Killer in Drag", "The Gay Underworld", "Black Lace Drag" and "A Study of Fetishes and Fantasies". Sure, he was a Marine and all, but get him near angora and all bets were off....

Anyway, you can read all about Wood's life and exploits elsewhere, the point of this posting is WHY you should take any time at all caring about Wood.

I'll tell you why: Wood may have created the worst films ever made, but at least he tried. That's right; he did his very best at making films he felt strongly about - films that he felt were worth making. And yes, even when he had to settle for sub-standard effects, below-par actors, one take at the most and funding secured only when he had to, say, have his cast baptized by the local church...he did what it took.

Who else in their right mind would not only have hired actors the likes of a 300-pound wrestler like Tor Johnson, a low-wattage actor like Paul Marco, a way-off-the-mark "psychic" like Criswell and a has-been star like Bela Lugosi...but give them steady work on top of that?

Who else could make a film about a man struggling with his inner torment of being a transvestite (Glen or Glenda?), follow it with a tale of a mad scientist planning on ruling the world with elongated men (Bride of the Monster) and continue on with grave robbers from outer space (Plan 9 From Outer Space), only to end his career making low-budget porn films?

And who, I ask you - WHO - could have such a fanatical following that he had an award-winning film made about his life and times (Ed Wood) that got an Oscar win for Martin Landau as Bela Lugosi and to this day has parades and conventions in his honor where people from all walks of life join together and even dress like characters from his films?

One man. One.

I think it goes without saying that Edward D. Wood Jr. was unappreciated in his lifetime - even ridiculed, one might say. No one can deny that his movies have more than their share of mistakes, ridiculous scenes, bad acting and dubious directorial choices. And not a one of his actors really looked comfortable mouthing dialogue the likes of this:

"Spaceships? You mean the kind from up there?"

"Pull the string! Life has begin! A story must be told!"

"Inspector Clay's dead! Murdered...and somebody's responsible!"

I mean, even Laurence Olivier couldn't make those lines less laughable, even with an assist from John Gielgud and a rewrite from Bill Shakespeare.

Make that several rewrites.

But Wood brought a certain integrity to his work. Even his most ridiculous works seemed to come from the heart.

You couldn't fault the man for not going with his original intentions from mind to written word to screen.

And it says something about those actors he had with him to the bitter end that they stood in front of his camera, spoke his words and were put through Wood's motions to make a film that may not have made them any richer but, hey, this wasn't just film-making: this was art.

This was a man's blood and sweat.

100% integrity.

In closing, let me just say that if you haven't yet done so, pick up a copy of Plan 9 or Night of the Ghouls or Orgy of the Dead or, better yet, find yourself a copy of the DVD The Haunted World of Edward D. Wood, Jr., a documentary that outlines the man's life about as well as you can possibly expect...right down to the red bra and panties.

This is a life worth celebrating. No doubt in my mind.

Look back in angora, people - celebrate the Wood.

Dope out.

- TGWD