Foreign Poster Atrocities #18

A new year begs a new poster and a bunch of new jibes. And so here we are to fulfill that obligation, me and Jeff are.

Shall we?

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JEFF - Hey, a Steve McQueen movie!

TGWD - This must be for The Great Escape.

TGWD - Or The Getaway.

JEFF - Bullitt, maybe?

TGWD - Could be it's for another one of his action-packed movies like...

TGWD - Wait a minute, is that...

JEFF - Huh?

TGWD - Look at the credits down there.

JEFF - Hmm...Aneta Corsaut...Irvin S. Yeaworth...wait a minute, aren't they...?

TGWD - Yeah....

JEFF - I mean, weren't Steve and Aneta in....

TGWD - Yeah....

JEFF - They weren't in a different....

TGWD - Nope....

JEFF - Then this is....

TGWD - Yeah....

JEFF - The Blob??!

TGWD - Uh-huh. The original and everything.

JEFF - But...but...

TGWD - Go on; let it all out....

JEFF - Steve never got his shirt ripped off in The Blob!

TGWD - Neither did Aneta carry a shotgun.

TGWD - Ho With A Shotgun, Rated NC-17.

JEFF - And look at that carnage!

TGWD - A whole city's worth.

JEFF - But The Blob was set in a small town!

TGWD - I know, I know....

JEFF - And there was never a helicopter in it, either!

TGWD - Preachin' to the choir, here....

JEFF - I mean; they even have SKYSCRAPERS in this poster!!

TGWD - Danger Planetaire, huh?

TGWD - That must be French for "Hey, Stupid Americans! Come and watch the same movie again! Muah-huh-haa!"

JEFF - It must be, because it has something else down there, too....

JEFF - "Le Fluide Mortel".

JEFF - ...

JEFF - Liquid Metal?

TGWD - No, that's not it...

JEFF - Fluide...liquid...water...

JEFF - Mortel...mortal...human...

TGWD - water...human...

JEFF - AquaMan?

TGWD - You don't know French, do you?

TGWD - Suffice it to say that false advertising knows no language.

JEFF - I'll go with that.

TGWD - This might as well be an ad for The Honeymoon Machine!

TGWD - Or Love with the Proper Stranger.

TGWD - The Cincinnati Kid, anyone?

JEFF - I mean, isn't this kind of thing against the law??

TGWD - It oughta be, it really oughta be.

JEFF - I might go along with it if this were for The Thomas Crown Affair.

TGWD - That'd be a stretch, but I can see that one.

TGWD - Possibly The Towering Inferno.

JEFF - If you kinda squint, Aneta does look like Faye Dunaway.

TGWD - The only way that would work is if one of those figures way in the back were Paul Newman.

JEFF - The Towering Inferno 2: City of Kindling.

TGWD - ...

TGWD - We've been doing these for too long.

JEFF - What? It's a good title.

TGWD - I take it back: YOU'VE been doing these for too long.

JEFF - Oh! And Aneta never showed that much leg!

JEFF - What would Sheriff Taylor say?

TGWD - Her teaching job would definitely be in jeopardy.

JEFF - For what, though; she picked up a shotgun and saved a fiery city from the wrath of AquaMan.

TGWD - And her boyfriend Steve McQueen slapped on Fabio's chest and held off the rushing flames as she shotgun-blasted the flaming buildings around them into submission.

JEFF - While the townsfolk behind them stumbled in terror.

TGWD - Hey...way in the back there...on the left....

JEFF - Yeah...?

TGWD - Otis.

JEFF - Oh yeah....

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And just think; we have 11 more of these to get through before the year's over. Yikes.

Dope (and Jeff) out.

- TGWD