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Sunday, November 30, 2008

Martorial elegance # 4

There are certain areas of Liverpool where a trend for Scouse schoolgirls to go out in gangs all dressed identikit in their pyjamas with Footlocker bought sportswear and girly flat shoes which has, apparently, prevailed for something close to a decade now. It's a self-contained trend which has remained entombed in the bowels of Merseyside. Until now.



And so it seems this trend has hit the Lache in C-Town but, naturally, the Lache has got its own twist on the original look. The pyjama pants are intact but the flats have been replaced with well-worn Reebok classics and the Footlocker sportswear has been substituted for an oversized skootcoat, which looks like the type of generic sports coat managers in league two are usually seen in, with some stupid patch on the back.

It's also interesting to note that while it's only teenage girls who sport this look on Merseyside, here in C-Town the trend has been adapted by rough old 40-something Ricky Hatton resembling Lache trogladyte birds who, according to Killa B who provided the photo, don't take kindly to the Chinese chaps working at the chippy not being able to understand them and their desire for their chip batch to be smothered with fatty butter substitutes.

Run, run, run from the ghetto bird..

Saturday, November 29, 2008

And Now, This Special Message for the Movie-Challenged...

Hi. TheGreatWhiteDope here.

I know many of you out there like to relax, sit back, pick up your favorite remote control and watch a movie. Hey, who doesn't? After all, it sure beats reading. But then comes the age-old problem: what to watch?

There are those for whom relaxing and watching a movie means to watch something that is, to put it quite bluntly, good. And I mean "good" as in a movie like Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm, Ben Hur, The Odessa File, The Music Man, something along those lines.

You know; films that have a universal reputation of being just plain good. Non-harmfully, substantially, soul-enrichingly and overall just plain-old good. Good in a way where you are talking to your friends and you say, "I saw Citizen Kane last night" and they respond by nodding positively and saying, "Yeah; that's a real good movie".

Good like that.

But then there are others out there for whom relaxing, sitting back, picking up your favorite remote control and watching a movie consists of sifting through your choices and watching something the likes of Starcrash, The Beast Within, Nukie or The Trial of Billy Jack and simply nothing else will fit the bill.

Terms of Endearment? Feh.

The Best Years of Our Lives? Whatever.

The English Patient? Let me know when its over; I'll be over here....

You're too discerning for that. After all, this is your time, your entertainment thirst that's being quenched. Do you really care about what's on Roger Ebert's Top Movies In The Whole Freakin' Galaxy list? Or Pauline Kael's Watch These Movies or Be Labeled a Communist rundown? Certainly not.

Roger Corman's Shortest-Produced Movies list? NOW you're talkin'.

But there are still those out there who must - no, demand - to have this explained to them in terms they understand.

For those individuals, I present this brief PSA (some material NSFW - no nudity, sorry):



And now that you have been sent on the right highway, go rent They Saved Hitler's Brain...and thank me later.

I'm TheGreatWhiteDope, and I approve this message.

Dope out.

-TGWD

Friday, November 28, 2008

I can feel a cumulus in the air tonight

Oh lord.




I think Diane the weather presenter from BBC North West Tonight might be the perfect woman : she wears really slutty stiletto heels, she can tell you if it's gonna rain the next day so you can plan your outfit accordingly and she's like a real life version of Janice from The Muppets who, along with Daisy Duke, prematurely caused my pre-teen nuts to rumble as a young'n.



She said she'd want my kids and help me make my next G'
tell me i ain't finesse, Diane Oxberry

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Happy Thanksgiving, my fellow turkeys!

Well, the holiday's come and gone, they turkey's been cooked, the pumpkin pie's been eaten, the leftovers are ready for lunch for the next few months and we're ready to go into the holiday-of-your-choice shopping season.

And as much as I wanted to post the faux movie trailer for Thanksgiving (NSFW) from the movie Grindhouse (which I still think got the short shrift at theaters), I found the following and felt that, yes, this must be posted.

So, here you go.



All I can say is: I'm glad it wasn't Easter.

Dope out.

-TGWD

oh, god.


yesterday i was in the stratford shopping center (not a classy place) and i saw a girl with a shirt that said 'JESUS DIED FOR MYSPACE IN HEAVEN' which i thought was really random and also funny because it didn't seem like she was wearing it in an ironic way. so, i looked it up online, and it seems like all the places you can buy it are christian websites. i don't get it. wouldn't that be an offensive thing if you were religious? i guess it's sort of a play on words, but it still seems odd. this is the product discription from 'Wear Your Faith.com'


Are you or your friends My Space fans? If so, remind them that Jesus dies for their space in heaven with this winter hoodie. The royal blue hooded cotton sweatshirt features “Jesus died for My Space in Heaven” on the front, which shows everyone where your priorities are. Winter will be here before you know it! Buy this tool for evangelizing today!


....what?



this also reminds me of a funny video:

oh, god.


yesterday i was in the stratford shopping center (not a classy place) and i saw a girl with a shirt that said 'JESUS DIED FOR MYSPACE IN HEAVEN' which i thought was really random and also funny because it didn't seem like she was wearing it in an ironic way. so, i looked it up online, and it seems like all the places you can buy it are christian websites. i don't get it. wouldn't that be an offensive thing if you were religious? i guess it's sort of a play on words, but it still seems odd. this is the product discription from 'Wear Your Faith.com'


Are you or your friends My Space fans? If so, remind them that Jesus dies for their space in heaven with this winter hoodie. The royal blue hooded cotton sweatshirt features “Jesus died for My Space in Heaven” on the front, which shows everyone where your priorities are. Winter will be here before you know it! Buy this tool for evangelizing today!


....what?



this also reminds me of a funny video:

Monday, November 24, 2008

modern day pin-ups

I looovveee this calander and want it so fuckin much. the ladies are somewhat-famous models (if only in the fashion world) dressed as old-school pin-ups (but w/ a modern twist. and not in a douche-y boring overdone way) and I really like it.


here are some of my favorites:



go here to see the rest of the lovely photos

modern day pin-ups

I looovveee this calander and want it so fuckin much. the ladies are somewhat-famous models (if only in the fashion world) dressed as old-school pin-ups (but w/ a modern twist. and not in a douche-y boring overdone way) and I really like it.


here are some of my favorites:



go here to see the rest of the lovely photos

bad tv

oh man. sometimes, I watch bad tv. not oh-this-is-a-funny-reality-bad-tv, but like actually bad -- bad writing, bad acting, bad everything (except for badass). one of those tv shows is one tree hill. it's the same thing as a soap opera. the storyline is so ridiculous and compelling that they really don't need to worry about the acting; people will tune in just to see what happens. (to give you an idea, a few episodes ago they had the nanny kidnap the kid's grandpa and subject him to torture, a la misery, before trying to kill the kid and his mom). and poor mr jones sometimes get subjected to such badness.

every once in a while, when he's not wincing or wondering why his boo watches shows that only appeal to 13-yr old girls, he'll notice something hilarious. like how one of the characters in one tree hill, mouth (seriously that's his name), looks like............

howdy doody!!!! how close is that resemblence?

bad tv

oh man. sometimes, I watch bad tv. not oh-this-is-a-funny-reality-bad-tv, but like actually bad -- bad writing, bad acting, bad everything (except for badass). one of those tv shows is one tree hill. it's the same thing as a soap opera. the storyline is so ridiculous and compelling that they really don't need to worry about the acting; people will tune in just to see what happens. (to give you an idea, a few episodes ago they had the nanny kidnap the kid's grandpa and subject him to torture, a la misery, before trying to kill the kid and his mom). and poor mr jones sometimes get subjected to such badness.

every once in a while, when he's not wincing or wondering why his boo watches shows that only appeal to 13-yr old girls, he'll notice something hilarious. like how one of the characters in one tree hill, mouth (seriously that's his name), looks like............

howdy doody!!!! how close is that resemblence?

Sunday, November 23, 2008

George Lucas and The Kingdom of Crushed Dreams

Okay, first of all I'm back and ready to return to the business of blogging.

Second of all, let me jump on the bandwagon here and start putting in my own two cents worth on the following:

What is the deal with George Lucas? Is he evil or not?

Before I get into this, let us put this whole thing into perspective. He started out just like any other USC film graduate with a dream - he wanted to make movies, just like his contemporary Francis Ford Coppola and Little Stevie Spielberg (though Steve went to a different alma mater, but never mind). And George IS the man who brought such films to life as THX-1138 (which I have the 2-disc edition of and it is wonderful, TYVM) and American Graffiti, both classics and worthy of watching regularly.

It isn't his fault that what he is best known for is that crazy story on his weathered, crinkled old yellow legal pad about a boy, a girl and a whole universe. After all, we sallied forth to our local theaters time and again to watch it and bought all the merchandise that came out. Hey, I still have all my old Star Wars drink glasses from Burger King. Don't you?

As he got older, though, I do think that he lost that same touch he had for a story that he had way back when. I could live with the Ewoks, Yoda's funny speech pattern and I can even forgive The Star Wars Holiday Special (So I like it - come on, fight me).

What I CANNOT forgive is his lapses in judgment in trying to explain away everything that made the first series of films (i.e., Star Wars, The Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi) so magical and so entertaining.

*Did we really need to have midi-chlorians introduced?

*Was Jar Jar Binks really necessary?

*Did the courtship of Anakin Skywaker and Padme have to be so treacly and sweet?

*Did Darth Maul have to have such a small part? And what about Count Dooku?

*What was with General Grievous' Eastern Ukranian accent?

*Did we need to have so many disparate changes in the "Special Editions" of the original movies?

*And why the chapter notations (Star Wars now being know as Chapter IV: A New Hope, Empire as Chapter V and so on); couldn't we just have the subtitles in the beginning and be done with it?

I don't know; maybe now that Lucas is sitting on the pile of money he made from the merchandising deals he cut with the Star Wars series he feels he can churn out anything that has the same characters and his blessing (The Clone Wars, anyone?) and not have to expend too much effort on it. After all, it'll just be that much more money in his pocket to spend on Skywalker Ranch and his next "brilliant idea".

After all, I don't think it was Spielberg's idea to put cute prairie dogs in the last Indiana Jones flick.

I guess he just doesn't feel like cowtowing to his core audience anymore. But what does he feel like doing? After all, if you ignore the people who got you where you are now, what does that do to your credibility in any future endeavor?

Just think about Lucas' output after 1977: can anyone remember anything else he did that wasn't Star Wars-related? Oh sure; he was responsible for helping Spielberg create the Indiana Jones film (and "Young Indiana Jones" TV series) juggernaut, he wrote the story for that 3-D Captain Eo thing that was at DisneyLand (or -World or whatever) for a few years, he wrote the story for Willow (which should have been a harbinger for things to come, methinks), but what else?

In the end, we should be happy that someone has had a successful career doing something that they love. But what if what they love doing one day becomes a business? A franchise? A billion-dollar-a-year enterprise with lawyers and executive boards and everything? Do they suddenly become a jerk in everyone's eyes? Not necessarily, but if they lose sight of that special talent that got them where they are to begin with, then - I say - yes.

It's not too late for George Lucas; he could change his mind and get back to basics for those mythical last three Star Wars films he promised way back in the beginning, introduce whole new ideas and begin just one more mythical journey that makes us all feel like kids again...or he could pull another chintzy, slap-dash burlesque that makes the Emperor lose just another piece of his clothing.

Everyone seems to expect the latter anymore. And I can't blame them. But maybe - just maybe, mind you - I'll be the one who sits in the back, away from the rabid throng of bandwagon-jumpers denouncing their once-revered messiah, drinking from my Luke Skywalker glass, hoping for the day when I can see a post-1983 LucasFilm logo on the screen and no longer feel a sense of dread.

Until that day comes, however, I'll thank you to keep your midi-chlorians away from me, thank you very much, Mr. Lucas; and take Jar-Jar with you.

Dope out.

-TGWD

Leaving Barry-Babylon.



Judging from recent pix of Nigo it seems that kecks which are too short revealing a good inch or two of leg/sock between your shoe and hem are now officially in vogue but my real gear-godz can spot a fashion-hack a mile off because The Martorialist keeps on makin' it, Blacon keeps on takin' it, Barry Davies created it and Japan keeps on fakin' it.



It's a look which has passed through the 60's with sharp-suited Mods to the 70's with Simon Cowell trousered trainspotter spods but it wasn't until the late 80's that this fashion-phenomenom received an actual official name : The Barry/Barry Pants (also see : Barry Kecks, Barries, Barried-up), with the term deriving from Barry Davies' not-quite-long-enough school pantaloons he wore to Blacon High throughout the duration of 1987 to 1992. So legendary were Barry's low-length leg covering garments they even had their own theme tune - Barry Trousers, sung to the tune of Baggy Trousers by Madness.



Fall back, Nigo. You can encase your lil' Jap legs in the finest selvedge the world has to offer and then hem and cuff them into position but you'll never have the natural effortless style and swagger that my man Barry Davies had. So fresh, so clean - y'nahmean?

Friday, November 21, 2008

We're the Harlem World crew and we're doing the do just for you...



Thought i was the freshest kid when I dropped a Dr Jeckyll & Mr Hyde (the original Ted Dibia$e and Gordon Gecko of the rap game) appreciation on Fat Lace a few months back until my man Super-Brad took a look at it and asked me why I hadn't spread any love in the direction of Doing The Do?

Dr Jeckyll & Mr Hyde - Doing The Do



Can't front - I hadn't even heard of it before but since it's a long out-of-print obscure b. side that's not even mentioned in the Ego Trip singles lists which is occasionally billed as being by the Harlem World Crew as opposed Jeckyll & Hyde then I don't feel like such a newjack for not knowin' it.

It's always good to come up on some old jam you never knew existed before and find yourself thinking that you've been living your life in false-happiness without it 'cause it's that good. Dare I say this might be even better than Gettin' Money or Fast Life and, thus, their best tune? You damn right.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Martorial elegance # 3

It's a time honoured man-tradition that at some point in life you have to borrow a suit off your dad because you don't have one. Gok Wan Eardley, pictured below, recently found himself in this situation and i'm pleased to report that the 4 elements of dad's-suit-syndrome are in full motherfucking effect :



1. Charcoal grey
2. Pinstripes
3. Slightly oversized Jacket with one arm longer than the other
4. Pants which are very slightly Barried-Up

Here's to the Eardmesiter for reppin' so correctly on all four fronts.

N**ga, you James Bond!



Pause.

Martorial elegance rating : 006 and 3 quarters.

"a better brew"

this is a v. interesting and light article in the new yorker about beers. a certain, specific brew, but beers nonetheless. it starts with paraguay, one of the heaviest wood in the world (palo santo), and dogfish brewery -- goes to the meta of what involves "craft beer" (aka not budweiser) and "extreme brewing" (the people who do it are probably as douche-y as it sounds) -- and ends with a giant beerfest (which is as sweet as it sounds)
Here is how the article starts:

Elephants, like many of us, enjoy a good malted beverage when they can get it. At least twice in the past ten years, herds in India have stumbled upon barrels of rice beer, drained them with their trunks, and gone on drunken rampages. (The first time, they trampled four villagers; the second time they uprooted a pylon and electrocuted themselves.) Howler monkeys, too, have a taste for things fermented. In Panama, they’ve been seen consuming overripe palm fruit at the rate of ten stiff drinks in twenty minutes. Even flies have a nose for alcohol. They home in on its scent to lay their eggs in ripening fruit, insuring their larvae a pleasant buzz. Fruit-fly brains, much like ours, are wired for inebriation.

Continue reading here . . .


"a better brew"

this is a v. interesting and light article in the new yorker about beers. a certain, specific brew, but beers nonetheless. it starts with paraguay, one of the heaviest wood in the world (palo santo), and dogfish brewery -- goes to the meta of what involves "craft beer" (aka not budweiser) and "extreme brewing" (the people who do it are probably as douche-y as it sounds) -- and ends with a giant beerfest (which is as sweet as it sounds)
Here is how the article starts:

Elephants, like many of us, enjoy a good malted beverage when they can get it. At least twice in the past ten years, herds in India have stumbled upon barrels of rice beer, drained them with their trunks, and gone on drunken rampages. (The first time, they trampled four villagers; the second time they uprooted a pylon and electrocuted themselves.) Howler monkeys, too, have a taste for things fermented. In Panama, they’ve been seen consuming overripe palm fruit at the rate of ten stiff drinks in twenty minutes. Even flies have a nose for alcohol. They home in on its scent to lay their eggs in ripening fruit, insuring their larvae a pleasant buzz. Fruit-fly brains, much like ours, are wired for inebriation.

Continue reading here . . .


Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Offer Nissim Rulez!

Είναι από τους αγαπημένους μου DJ, έχει κάνει μερικά από τα καλύτερα remix σε ονόματα όπως: Christina Aguilera, Beyonce, Madonna, Michael Jackson, Shirley Bassey, Jennifer Lopez, Donna Summer, Angie Stone, Suzanne Palmer, Deborah Cox, Dana International και πολλών άλλων. Ας τα πάρουμε απ'την αρχή όμως τα πράγματα:
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* O Offer Nissim γεννήθηκε το 1964 στο Tel Aviv.
* Eίναι πολύ δημοφιλής DJ και παραγωγός της tribal house, progressive και club σκηνής τα τελευταία 25 χρόνια, ειδικά στο Ισραήλ και την Αμερική.
* Έχει παίξει στα μεγαλύτερα clubs της Νέας Υόρκης, του Παρισιού, καθώς και στο καρναβάλι του Ρίο.
* Όλα ξεκίνησαν το 1979 όταν του ζητήθηκε από ένα gay club να αντικαταστήσει έναν DJ που ήταν άρρωστος.
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* Αρχές του '90, γνωρίζεται με την Dana International κι αποφασίζουν να κάνουν μια διασκευή-παρωδία στο γνωστό hit της Whitney Houston "My name is not Susan" σε "My name is not Saida". Το κομμάτι έγινε τεράστια επιτυχία τo 1993 στο Ισραήλ και τις Αραβικές χώρες, πουλώντας 6 εκατομμύρια αντίτυπα.
* Είναι ο παραγωγός του νικητήριου τραγουδιού της Dana International στη Eurovision, "Diva".
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* To 2004 γνωρίζει την άγνωστη Ισραηλινή τραγουδίστρια Maya, με την οποία έκαναν αμέσως "κλικ", και συνεργάζονται ακόμα και σήμερα, έχοντας στο ενεργητικό τους μεγάλες επιτυχίες όπως "Searching", "First time", "That's the way I like it", "Perfect love", "For your love", "Happy people", "Why", "I'm in love", παρουσιάζοντας εξαιρετικά δείγματα στην vocal house σκηνή.
* Έχει κυκλοφορήσει 4 albums: "Searching" ("First time" στην Αμερική) (2004), "Second time" (2006), "Forever Tel Aviv" (2007) και "Happy people" (2008).
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THE TOP-5 REMIXES
1. BEYONCE "One night only"
2. LUZ DIVINA "In your eyes"
3. CHRISTINA AGUILERA "Hurt"
4. SHIRLEY BASSEY "La passione"
5. SUZANNE PALMER "Eye can see u"
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MY TOP-5 OFFER NISSIM feat. MAYA SONGS
1. "Love"
2. "I'm in love"
3. "Summer night city"
4. "For your love"
5. "That's the way I like it"
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"LOVE"

"I'M IN LOVE"

"SUMMER NIGHT CITY"

did you know . . .

mr. jones and I were watching Aladdin last night on TV (which by the way, if you haven't seen it since you were little, should totally watch it again . . . it is hilarious) and the person who plays aladdin has the cutestttt voice so mr. jones looked it up and guess whose voice is aladdin???




..................................... he was on full house ..............................



STEVE from full house!!!! you can go here to see what he's up to.

Here are some fun facts about Steve:

-Graduated from Harvard University in 1998 (majored in English, minored in French literature) --hayy smartayy!!!
-Fluent in French, lived in Paris
-Graduated from Harvard University 1998 magna cum laude
-He did the voice for Aladdin (both the series and the speaking part in the movie), and in one episode of "Full House" (1987), the one where the family goes to Disney World, D.J. fantasized that he was Aladdin
-Was born on the exact same day as Kate Winslet

Where He Is Now
(2006) On the writing staff of the WB comedy "What I Like About You."
(January 2007) Guest starring as "Dr. Kershnar" on NBC's "Scrubs."
(2008) On the writing staff of The CW's critically acclaimed "Privileged."

(god I have wayyy too much free time)

did you know . . .

mr. jones and I were watching Aladdin last night on TV (which by the way, if you haven't seen it since you were little, should totally watch it again . . . it is hilarious) and the person who plays aladdin has the cutestttt voice so mr. jones looked it up and guess whose voice is aladdin???




..................................... he was on full house ..............................



STEVE from full house!!!! you can go here to see what he's up to.

Here are some fun facts about Steve:

-Graduated from Harvard University in 1998 (majored in English, minored in French literature) --hayy smartayy!!!
-Fluent in French, lived in Paris
-Graduated from Harvard University 1998 magna cum laude
-He did the voice for Aladdin (both the series and the speaking part in the movie), and in one episode of "Full House" (1987), the one where the family goes to Disney World, D.J. fantasized that he was Aladdin
-Was born on the exact same day as Kate Winslet

Where He Is Now
(2006) On the writing staff of the WB comedy "What I Like About You."
(January 2007) Guest starring as "Dr. Kershnar" on NBC's "Scrubs."
(2008) On the writing staff of The CW's critically acclaimed "Privileged."

(god I have wayyy too much free time)

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

leather or crystal and glass? (year 3)

ah, the age-old question of what to get somebody for their wedding anniversary. well, now your problem is solved! go here to see what the traditional wedding gift is for whichever anniversary year. they break it down by:

*Year
*Traditional Gift
*Modern Gift
*Alternate Gift
*Flowers
*Alternate Stones


and now, time for lovely wedding pics that I spent wayyy too much time on google image looking up

white trash wedding



dominatrix wedding



werid celeb wedding that I can't stop staring at


nerd wedding




fast food wedding





is-that-danny-bonaduce? beach wedding




frat wedding





******and*the*winner******

chola wedding that I'm obsessed with (and btw I actually am really into it. I'm serious. I want their outfits -- but with boots instead of strappy sandals)
the end.